Tag Archives: teaching

A Work in Progress

I’ve been rereading all that I’ve posted here since beginning “My Sea of Thought” and I realize that I’ve written about a lot of “lessons I’m learning.” Because of that, one might assume that I have it all together.  I can assure you that I don’t so I wanted to set things straight.

In the past two years I truly have begun to understand some things about myself.  I think it started when I read the book “A Confident Heart” by Renee Swope of www.proverbs31.org .  I believe with all my heart that God directed me to this book to help begin a process of healing and growing.  Since then, through music, readings, and study, I think I’ve developed a clearer picture of my true self and the woman I want to be.  The thing is that being presented with a lesson and applying it are two different things.  It’s just like all the years teaching in my classroom…I prepared and presented lessons everyday but what my students did with the information was up to them.  I have very good intentions but I’m sad to say they don’t always develop into actions.

I’m finding that my ramblings here benefit me.  It’s a way to clarify the changes I need and want to make…a way for me to get a picture of this new and improved person I desire to be.  It’s kind of like an artist who allows the picture he has inside of himself to come to life through his paint; turning an empty canvas into a masterpiece.  In my case, I am the empty canvas gradually coming to life but I have a long way to go!

Confucius said, “It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” I want you to know that I am moving more slowly than I’d like to admit.  Old thought patterns and insecurities die hard but I’m determined to steadily put one foot in front of the other.  I so hope that some of my life lessons resonate with you, too.  I am learning (here I go again!) that through shared struggles and triumphs we gain a better understanding of each other and by offering support and encouragement we make moving forward just a little easier.  It is a life-long, often bumpy journey that requires patience and dedication but one that when traveled culminates in creating a unique masterpiece of each of us.    Slowly but surely it’s the journey I yearn to take.

Scoop’in Frogs

Scoop'in Frogs

Scoop’in Frogs

Well, I had a new experience this week.  Something I’ve never done before.  What was it you ask?  For the first time ever (and maybe last) I scooped dead frogs, eight to be exact, out of my daughter’s pool. Now, I’ve had the reputation as “the teacher who loves frogs” and it is true, I loved to decorate with frogs, but touching them?….that’s another story….AND a fact I never let the kids know.  So, to see motionless frogs with their little arms stretched out, floating on the clear pool water was just a little disconcerting for me.  Wanting to be a helpful mother however, I ignored my squeamish stomach, bravely grasped the pool net, scooped those bloated, gelatinous amphibians out of the water and launched them over the fence where they plopped right onto their final resting place.  I’m sure that wasn’t the plan they had when they jumped into the cool, evening water.

I don’t know what caused the demise of those poor frogs.  Chlorine maybe or smothering under the solar cover.  Whatever it was wouldn’t have happened though if they hadn’t been somewhere they weren’t supposed to be. How like us humans is that?  We see something we want and ignoring the consequences we dive right in after it.   Food?  Relationships?  Spending?  The list goes on and on and it’s different for all of us.  We’ve all been there.  We want what we want.  Just like bugs to a light or frogs to a pool, we leap in head first after the bright and shiny, rich and juicy, attractive and available ignoring common sense or the voice of reason setting off alarms in our heads.  At that split second before impact we sometimes realize things might not be as they seemed, but it’s too late.  Splash! We are in over our heads.

I’m also curious why the frogs wandered to the swimming pool in the first place when there is a beautiful stream flowing nearby.  Were they misguided by the notion that what they had wasn’t good enough or did they blindly follow the frog crowd? Whatever the reason they’d been better off staying where they belonged.  We too, often overlook our blessings and presume that we deserve more.  Listening to popular culture we are led to believe there is a better way than our way.  I have fallen for these mistruths more times than I’d like to admit.  For example, while focusing on what I wish to weigh I have forgotten to be thankful for the food I have.  When worrying about whether my clothing is in style or the right brand I lack gratitude for my full closet. And so on and so on.  Wanting more leads to wanting more until we can become so weighted down with our wants that we sink in despair.  It is a lesson I need to take to heart and wish I could have learned sooner!

As fall quickly approaches I am challenging myself  to not wait until November but to have an attitude of Thanksgiving NOW! I am going to purposely look for blessings in everyday things. I want to express gratitude to those who are “hopping” along this journey with me.  I want to embrace who I am and where I belong.

Scoop’in frogs again isn’t in my future anytime soon but I am going to try to scoop up blessings until my net overflows. What about you? Have you thought about having an “attitude of gratitude”? Now’s the time!  Jump on in the water is fine! (if you’re not a frog that is)

Preparing for the Climb

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My First “Small” Summit

It’s been a tough week.  School started and I wasn’t there.  For the first time in thirty-three years I didn’t decorate my classroom with colorful frogs, prepare fun opening day activities, or pick out a “first day of school” outfit.  I am done, finished…….retired.  I fully expected to feel happy and free but instead I feel disconnected and at loose ends.

Life is not static.  Changes come like the rise and fall of the mountains.  Just when we sigh a breath of relief on the downhill side another slope ascends before us.  Right now I feel like I am facing Spruce Knob, the highest point in West Virginia.  I can’t see what waits for me on the other side and the climb seems difficult, my footing unsure .  I am reminded that it is in exactly these times that faith propels us to the top.  It is faith that helps us take that first step, faith that whispers “don’t look down”, and faith that assures us that we’re almost there.

When I focus on ME and try to control the climb, I stumble every time.  But when I concentrate less on my own effort and more on “The Guide” the rise to the summit seems possible.  Now, I am not there yet but I am “in training”.  Taking baby steps and scaling small peaks is preparing me for the precipice that is this new life of mine. We all face cliffs and crags in our lives, but remembering to cling to “The Rock” helps us face those challenges and the unknown without the fear of falling.  Let’s shout that from the mountaintops!

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Simple Love Notes

It took six days but I finally have my classroom cleaned out of 32 years of saving, creating, collecting, and reusing stuff!  It only took five or six wheelbarrow loads a short trip to the dumpster and a LONG walk down memory lane.  Deep in the corners of drawers, cupboards and shelves I found trinkets, artwork, and gifts I have received through the years.  Precious things that a teacher just cannot throw away.  Amongst these treasures were a variety of love notes from former students.  Some scribbled on scraps of paper.  Others drawn with crayons or markers and the paper filled with colorful drawings.  Reading those forgotten notes brought back vivid memories of children I taught who are now adults with children of their own as well as students I have had more recently.  Many letters had no name on them to identify the writer just the words “I love you” in a child’s print, but I saved them all just the same.

The offering of love is a precious gift. One that we should all freely give.   Children seem to understand this better than we adults.  Four little words,  You’re the best teacher”, scribbled on  the back of an old wrinkled spelling test years ago, filled me with such joy when I received it and again when I uncovered it last week.  Six words…..”I wish you were my mother”.  Three words….”I love you”.  It seems so simple….feel something and express it, but we know that giving love is risky.  We might be hurt or made fun of.  The feeling may not be returned.  We can think of many reasons for not opening our hearts to others.  It seems easier just to keep it to ourselves.

After experiencing the overwhelming warmth of love I felt as I read each note I found, I’m determined to be braver and more willing to show others how I feel about them.  Maybe it will be through a smile, a hug, a gift, or who knows, even through a love note.  It doesn’t have to be elaborate.  It doesn’t have to be planned.  It just simply has to be shared.

Before I started cleaning out my classroom, I promised myself (and my husband) that I wouldn’t bring too much home with me.  I must confess though, that I could not bring myself to throw away those precious acts of love I had been so freely given.  I tucked them away in a special box to be gone through again when my heart needs reminding about the wonderful power of a simple love note.

A Simple Love Note

A Simple Love Note

Celebrations

Oh my!  So much has happened since my last post.  It has been a whirlwind and I haven’t quite stopped spinning yet.  In the past two weeks I have been the speaker at the 6th grade commencement,  finished the school year with my Second Graders, made it through my retirement ceremony, spent the weekend on a mountaintop with girlfriends, and traveled with my family to Indiana for my nephew’s High School Graduation Open House.  Whew!

As you can see, my last two weeks have been a series of celebrations!  It’s funny, each event celebrated an ending but at the same time they also celebrate new beginnings.  The Sixth Graders are leaving Elementary School behind but will be making new friends in Middle School.  My Second Graders will no longer sit in their small desks in my classroom but will instead move down the hall into larger desks and will learn so many new and exciting things. I am no longer a teacher at NFES.  There are so many parts of that I do not want to end, however there is a small tickle of anticipation beginning to grow in my soul at the thought of taking a new path.  My friends and I escaped to a mountain retreat to celebrate not one but THREE retirees!  We each have taught for many years and to see it end is scary and yet each of us have new hopes, dreams, and goals we desire to fulfill as we begin this new life stage.  And finally, my nephew has accomplished so much and has made us very proud during his High School years but now he will move on and begin his path to finding the perfect career.

These past two weeks have been filled with laughter, hugs, reminiscing, and yes, tears. Through it all I am reminded that though life presents many endings it also gifts us with new beginnings that take us into unchartered territory. Thankfully it does not send us there unprepared.  We take with us all the lessons we have learned along the way, the support of those who mean the most to us, and the confidence that our steps are guided to lead us right where we are meant to be. Yes, endings can be sad and scary but discovering the possibilities that our new beginnings offer us are definitiely a reason for celebration!

Countdown to Retirement~Day 4~A Goat Story

On a normal school day I get up, have my cup of coffee, get dressed, eat breakfast, pack my lunch, and head off to school.  I have done the same thing for more mornings than I can count.  This morning however, had just a little more excitement!  After I had gotten dressed but before I packed my lunch I heard an unusual noise.  I looked out my front door and found that one of our neighbor’s goats was wedged between a building and the fence AND he had his head, horns and all, stuck through the fence.  Now, I was raised a city girl but I’ve learned a few things in 32 years of country living. Unfortunately, being a “goat whisperer” is not one of them.  I frantically worked for 20 minutes to try and free that crazy animal’s head from what I thought was sure death!  After having my fingers pinched between goat horns and fence wire several times, I came to the conclusion that I was not going to be able to save the poor thing so decided to call around the neighborhood to find someone stronger to help me.  Promising the goat I would return I quickly ran inside to use the phone.  Would you believe that as the phone was ringing on the other end I looked out the window and that dumb goat was gone!!!! He had freed himself and was back on the top of the hill with the herd!!! ( now you decide who was the dumb one…him or me!)

Sometimes, being a teacher is a little bit like my goat friend this morning.  Decisions that are out of our control are made and the results wedge us into places we don’t want to be.  What we know and believe to be true about children is overlooked and expectations are placed upon us that are cumbersome and unrealistic.  Of course, most of us do all we can to try and accomplish what is asked of us, all the while working to help our students be the best they can be.  And just about the time we start to figure it all out, the expectations change again and there we are stuck just like the goat with someone who doesn’t have the skills to help, trying to push us in a direction we don’t want to go.  I truly believe that if the powers that be would offer teachers the time and opportunity to find their own way, they would be surprised at how quickly it would free us to practice what we know to be right and allow us to lead our students to the top of the hill, right where every “kid” should be!

Count Down To Retirement~Day 5

Well let’s see, since I last posted,  I’ve ridden a school bus for my final class field trip, cheered through my last Field Day, and today, graded the last set of papers of my career.  I have to be honest.  I won’t miss field trips, field days, or grading papers too much and yet it makes me melancholy just the same. As I reflect on that, I guess even though they weren’t my favorite things about being a teacher, they are still part of the job. As with anything, you take the good with the bad and if you’re lucky the good outweighs the bad.  I’ve been very lucky.

For the last 32 years I have been honored to work with the most wonderful teachers and staff.  Our school has been a place of support, cooperation, and encouragement for our students and each other.  My fellow teachers have been my sounding board, shoulder to cry on, and at times the voice of reason that I needed.  I truly couldn’t have made it this far without them.  I’ve tried to figure out a way to let them know what they mean to me but have decided it’s impossible.  How do I put into words all the feelings that fill my heart?  First of all, I am an emotional wreck in the best of times. This week will probably be a super storm of feelings for me anyway, so actually saying the words (if I had them) will be virtually impossible.  I only hope that a smile through my tears, hugs that are tighter than usual, and whispered thank yous will convey to them more than just those simple gestures.  I hope it will let them know that they are blessings in my life and have given me the best gift anyone can receive.  They have turned a school into so much more…..a place to turn to when I am troubled, a place to share my joys, a place of protection, a place of inspiration, a place to laugh, and a place to grow.  The good has abundantly outweighed the bad. I may have been a teacher for 32 years but I have learned more from my school family than they’ll ever know.  And for that, I am eternally grateful.  Yes, I have been VERY lucky!

Adventure Awaits

A new adventure awaits me.  There’s nothing God can’t do… But when I take a leap of faith, God will see me through.

It is an absolutely beautiful Sunday here in West Virginia!  Time sure has flown by since my last post.  It’s an extremely busy time of year at school as we try to wind everything up and fit everything in.  The last day for students is only seven days away and so that means that the end of my teaching career is officially over in nine days.  I have been struggling with this idea of retirement, of late.  Feelings of sadness and insecurity have been seeping into my soul. Sadness because I really do love teaching children and for 32 years being a teacher has been my identity.  Insecurity because I DO NOT LIKE CHANGE!!!!  I know how silly all this sounds but I figured you should know how wacky I really am!  I continue to remind myself that I am blessed beyond measure to be at a place where I can retire and that it IS time for me to move on. During my quiet time this morning it became clear to me that this is an opportunity to trust and have faith.  Trust that I am on the right path and faith that God has a new plan for my life.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I wish there was a magic wand that I could wave and suddenly I’d have all the faith and confidence I will ever need.  Unfortunately, that’s not how it works.  I am learning that it is a process….the proverbial two steps forward, one step back.  It drives me crazy!  As a person who is a perfectionist- people pleaser, this process isn’t easy. I want to get it right and and get it right now!  Thank goodness God and the people in my life are patient and don’t give up on me!

imageWalt Disney said, “Without change, there would be no butterflies”.  I am trying to take this to heart and embrace what the future holds for me.  Will I move through it perfectly?  No.  Will my faith never waiver?  No.  But, I am going to step onto this new path trusting that I won’t be traveling alone and that an exciting adventure awaits!  I hope you will come along with me as I begin this new journey, but I warn you, it may take some patience!

An Apple a Day

Whew! It has been a busy time at school and at home so I am behind in my posts! Sorry!  For each of the three Fridays we had in school in April I planned a school-wide poetry activity as part of the Poetry Box Project.  The first Friday was the unveiling of the box and I had the kids try their hand at writing a “Never Poem” using alliteration.  Like:  “I would never wear big, borrowed, blue and burgandy bloomers!” They were great fun and the students wrote some hilarious poems!image

On the second Friday, I based the activity around Kenn Nesbitt’s poem “I Bought a Pet Banana”.  While searching for activity ideas, I happened across Kenn’s website; www.poetry4kids.com . (be sure and check it out)  He suggested to have kids write their own poems about having a pet apple.  I loved the idea AND Kenn has a poem beginning in the Poetry Box,  so it seemed perfect to do a Pet Apple Activity.  The students were each given an apple and crafting supplies and the magic began!  We soon had a cafeteria full of unique “pet apples”.  The children then were challenged to write their own Pet Apple Poems and write they did!  It is amazing what they can come up with!  I decided to try my hand at it as well, and this is what resulted:

I Bought A Pet Apple

I bought a small pet apple

He was round and red,

I tried to sit him on my lap

But he rolled off instead.

He wobbled and he rolled

Across the wooden floor,

And then my small pet apple

Went right out the back door.

I tried to lasso him

To make him come to a stop,

But he fell into the pool

With a flip, a flap, a flop.

I’m taking my small pet apple

Back to the pet store

The water made him mushy

All the way to his apple core.

~Cindy Wilkins

It’s funny how we lose ourselves in “adult life”.  I had journals full of poems I wrote in my teens and twenties and then between family, work, and other committments that part of me disappeared, until now that is!  Who would have thought that an apple could inspire my poet’s soul to reappear?  All too often I think, we believe that we don’t deserve or have time to pursue the things we love.  Maybe we yearn to paint, take photographs, carve wood, run a marathon, or write poetry but we tell ourselves that everyone and everything else needs to come first.  Before we know it, our passions have been pushed so far aside that they seem out of reach.  This experience of being a Poetry Box Ambassador has prompted me to look at things differently and what I now see is that we are all created with our own unique set of passions.  Passions that are designed to define and fulfill us. While we may travel through life completing all the required tasks set before us, we are missing out on the best part of the trip.   Think back to when you were younger.  What did you love to do and think about?  What inspired you?  I think it is vital that we rediscover that part of us to truly live a long, happy, healthy life.  You know what they say….”An apple a day keeps the doctor away” or in my case….an apple poem. I plan to continue to get reaquainted with the poet in me.  I hope you too, will take the time for yourself to rediscover the you that YOU are truly meant to be.

 

What Poetry Can Do: Life Lessons Part 2

It is a beautiful Sunday afternoon here! My spirit is full from a lovely church service, my tummy is full from an enjoyable lunch with friends, and now I hope to fill you with a few more life lessons I have learned from the Poetry Box Project.  In preparing for the arrival of the Poetry Box, I had our local librarian collect as many books written by our poetry authors as she could find for me.  One of the books drew my attention right away.  It was “Knock at a Star” by X.J. Kennedy and Dorothy Kennedy (X.J has the beginning of a poem in the Poetry Box).  They listed six things that poetry can do for children.  Those six are included in my life lessons post last time and in this one today, along with two more I added so that we had a balloon message for each classroom. Here we go…..image

Message 5 : “Poetry Sends Messages”

In this month long excursion into poetry, I think the students and I have enjoyed the poems that have sent  funny messages the most!  You know what I mean.  The ones that talk about underpants, bratty sisters, boogers, or teachers being eaten by aliens.  There is something about being in a room of children and having in your hands the power to make them laugh!  And how fun it is as a teacher to laugh right along with them!  (even if they are laughing whille picturing me being eaten by aliens…) Sometimes it would start with a snicker or a giggle, then came the snort, and finally the all out belly shaking, knee slapping, fall out of your chair laugh!  It is a joyous sound and one that is heard far too little in today’s classrooms…..don’t get me started.  I tell my students the first day of school that they need to know that their Second Grade Teacher is Crazy!  (And she is!) I am letting them see that I will make mistakes, have bad hair days, wear mismatched socks, and countless other things.  This creates a safe place for them to be themselves too.  I believe learning should be fun, whether it is learning in the classroom or learning to navigate life. When is the last time you have had a side-splitting, tears down the cheek laugh?  We need to laugh more!  We need to learn to laugh at those little bumps in the road we encounter every day.  We need to learn to laugh at ourselves and allow others to laugh right along with us. We need to make life a safe place to be ourselves. It is pretty hard to be mad at each other or make fun of one another if we are laughing in unison at the comedy act that is life!

Message 6:  “Poetry Starts You Wondering”

We have read many poems about animals and nature.  They have prompted us to wonder about the world around us. One of the scary parts of being a teacher is having to be prepared for hard questions.  Children wonder about a lot of things and they are not afraid to ask.  It happens often during Science time.  The world is an amazing place and there is so much to learn!  I love to turn the hard questions back to the children and ask them why they think things are so.  Their answers are sometimes so full of eight year old wisdom that I have to pause and take it all in.  Having curiousity like a child is a trait I hope to always possess.  Every year we study the life cycle of the Monarch Butterfly and every year when the children have gone home and the room is empty, I stare at the caterpillars hoping to witness the exact moment they become a chrisilys and every year it happens in the blink of an eye.  It is a true miracle that keeps me wondering and wondering is a good thing!  So, whether we are wondering about nature, other cultures, religion, problems we see, or our future, we need to do it with the enthusiasm and curiousity of an eight year old.  If we do, we will open ourselves to the limitless possibilities the world has in store for us.

Message 7:  “Poetry Makes Music Out of Words”

I have a confession to make.  I am a music-a-holic.  It’s true.  I can’t get enough.  I like all kinds.  Some people would say that my iPod is filled to excess.  I say, I was born with a musical soul. I pretty much hear a song in my head all day long. (Crazy remember?)  I even wake up at night sometimes with lyrics going through my mind.  I think that is why I love poetry so much.  The words in a poem create a melody and a beat that makes me want to sing along.  There are songs and poems for bad times and sad times in life.  There are songs and poems for joyous and glad times.  They speak to me.  They comfort me. They inspire me.  I want my life to do that for my students, family, and friends too.  I want to be there for them in their good and not so good times.  I want to have the right words to say.  I want to comfort and uplift them.  Most of all I want to inspire them with a tune that helps them want to become the best they can be. And if they awake in the dark of night, I hope that a message of hope, a song of joy, or a poem of love from me, crosses their mind and brings them into the light of day.

And finally, Message 8:  “Poetry Makes You Smile”

Poetry is about life.  It is a gift from one person to the world.  It touches us, challenges us. and can change us. I told the children in our school on the day we unveiled the Poetry Box that “there was poetry in all of them”.  I do believe there is poetry in all of us. We are gifts to the world, we can touch others, challenge others, and bring about change.  Most of all, we all have the power to help someone find their smile.  I hope these lessons have helped you find yours.