Well, this rule follower is stretching the rules today. I’m combining two days into one post to finally catch up. I might as well admit it now, I’ll probably stretch the five minute limit too….
“Work harder!” “Do better!” “Don’t fail!” This was my mantra for many years. Those of you who are close to me or who have read some of my blog know that I’m a recovering perfectionist. For oh so long, I believed that I had to earn the love and approval of others and God. I guess we all know how that worked out! The harder I tried, the more I failed, so the harder I tried. It was an exhausting vicious circle! Attempting to be a flawless daughter, teacher, wife, mother, friend, and Christian seemed right to me, but always impossible. So of course, I concluded that I’d just have to continue to work harder to measure up!
Enter God and a circle of Christian friends!
Joining a small group changed everything! There I learned that I needed to revise my thinking and the way I was living. What a relief it was to finally understand that I. Absolutely. Will. Never. Be. Good. Enough! It’s a large learning curve for a works girl to believe, live, and become a grace girl! It takes a lot of editing! Rewriting the dialog in my head, deleting my “saved by works” attitude, and amending my focus from what I can do myself to what God has already done, is definitely an on-going process.
Jesus went to the cross because you and I cannot do anything on our own to be worthy of eternal life. I’d be lying if I said it’s easy for this perfectionist extraordinaire to let go of her ways. Maybe you can relate. I take comfort in, and you can too, that each of us is a work in progress. Revisions are required. But, what peace it brings to know that we can trust God, the true Author of our story, to complete it to perfection!